Tough Love, Gentle Grace
DEVOTIONALS
Written Miracle
10/19/20256 min read
Hey there Beloved!
I pray all is well with you, and I’m so glad you’ve joined me this week. If this is your first time here, welcome! I’m so happy you decided to check in.
This season, we’ve been getting warm and cozy, FALL’ing deeper in love with Jesus.
To those who’ve been with me since the start of this series, hasn’t it been such a beautiful journey? Truly, there’s no greater intimacy than falling in love with the One who knows us completely. A God who sees every part of who we are… and still whispers, “You’re Mine.”
That is surely a love that can be trusted, Sis!
God’s love is consistent, it’s BIG, it’s deep, it’s faithful, and as stated, it’s beautiful.
However, what I have learned over the years is that God’s love is not always rainbows, flowers, and butterflies. God gives tough love too. And honestly, that kind of love is what I cherish the most. It’s in those moments of trials, tests, and hardships that I begin to see just how intentional His love really is.
A love that corrects, convicts, redirects, and refines. Not to break us, but to build us.
God always extends grace and is gentle with us, especially His daughters, but He uses tough love to challenge us, stretch us, and call us to grow into the fullness of who He created us to be.
The title of this devotional is:
Tough Love, Gentle Grace
So let’s dive deep, Sis. I want to keep the introduction brief so we can explore the four powerful ways God’s tough love works to refine, shape, and strengthen us.
Expose the Heart: Examine idols & issues of the heart
“Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands.” (Deuteronomy 8:2, NIV)
God has made promises and desires to bless us exceedingly and abundantly. But before He releases those blessings, He wants our hearts to be cleansed and purified. God doesn’t want us to carry hidden idols or selfish agendas into the places He’s calling us. So, in His love, He will often lead us through seasons of hardship, not to harm us, but to expose and examine what is not of Him or from Him.
Because the truth is, when life is smooth and everything goes our way, it’s easy to praise God. But it’s in the trials that our faith and our true feelings toward Him rise to the surface.
A powerful example of this is when God allowed the Israelites to wander in the wilderness for forty years before entering the Promised Land. They longed for a shortcut. They wanted comfort, convenience, and control. Yet through their wandering, God was doing a deeper work. The wilderness became a mirror that revealed what was truly inside: doubt, discontentment, and disbelief. In His tough love, God exposed their idols and attitudes, not to destroy them, but to refine them and prepare them for the promise ahead.
Produce Endurance & Deeper Faith: Make you stronger in the Spirit
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:2–4, NIV)
As Believers, we must be wise and strong in the Spirit. This is why God blesses us with discernment and the fruits of the Spirit. Being strong in the Spirit means developing endurance—the ability to stand firm in our faith regardless of how things appear in the natural. God uses tough love to build that endurance and deepen our faith. He doesn’t want us to be easily shaken or quick to give up when life gets hard. Instead, He desires that we persevere through every test and trial. So at times, He allows situations to become uncomfortable and challenging as an act of His tough love, not to weaken us, but to make us spiritually stronger.
A powerful example of this is Joseph. He received a promising dream about his calling and purpose, but after sharing it with his brothers, he was betrayed, sold into slavery, falsely accused, and imprisoned. For many years, his reality looked nothing like his dream. Yet through every hardship, God was producing endurance and deepening Joseph’s faith in His promises. When the time was right, Joseph’s spiritual strength and steadfast faith positioned him to lead nations during a severe famine.
Build Character & Humility
“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” (Job 1:21)
God uses hardships to build character. God Himself is the ultimate example of integrity, and since we are made in His image, we too are called to reflect upright character. This is not about being perfect, but about allowing Him to shape us in righteousness.
Humility is also essential to God. Through His tough love, He humbles us so that we learn to rely fully on Him. We begin to understand that our ultimate dependence is not on our jobs, family, or friends. Those are resources, but God is the Source.
A powerful example of this is Job. Job faced unimaginable trials and lost almost everything. Who allowed it? God Himself gave the enemy permission to test him. Yet it was never to set Job up for failure. Instead, God’s purpose was to set him up for success. These trials refined him, built his character, strengthened his perseverance, and cultivated humility. God’s tough love revealed Job’s faithfulness. In the end, Job was restored and blessed abundantly, illustrating how God’s refining love produces a life of endurance, faith, and unwavering trust.
Training Before Elevation & Future Purpose: Testing what you have learned from prior seasons
“Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love Him.” (James 1:!2, NIV)
God uses tough love as a means of testing. In school, teachers give tests to see if students are ready to move to the next level. In the same way, God, our loving Father and wise Teacher, uses tests to see if we are prepared for the next level He’s calling us to. These tests aren’t meant to break us but to build us. God never sets His children up for failure; He sets us up for success. Through His tough love, He ensures that we are trained, strengthened, and equipped to step confidently into His plans and purposes for our lives.
A powerful example of this is found in the life of King David. David was anointed at just fifteen years old, yet he didn’t step into his kingship until he was thirty. During those years in between, David faced countless challenges, running from Saul, living in caves, and enduring betrayal and hardship. But through every trial, God was training him in courage, humility, and leadership. So when David finally took the throne, he was not only ready to rule but prepared to lead with wisdom and fulfill God’s Kingdom purposes.
So Sis, I pray this has encouraged you. Walking with Christ is not easy. It gets uncomfortable, challenging, and can even feel isolating at times. But know this: even in your hardest seasons, God is still loving you. We don’t face hardship for no reason, and God is not punishing us. He’s loving us, a love that’s tough, but necessary. A love that corrects, convicts, redirects, and refines. Not to break us, but to build us into the women He created us to be.
Prayer:
Heavenly Father, My God in Heaven,
I thank You for Your love, even when it is tough, and for Your gentle grace that sustains me through every trial. I know that every challenge and season of discomfort is designed to refine me, strengthen me, and prepare me for the purposes You have for my life. Lord, examine my heart and reveal anything that is not of You. Help me to surrender my idols, my agendas, and my desires so that I may fully rely on You. Teach me to persevere with endurance, to grow in faith, and to walk in humility and integrity. Equip me for the next level You are calling me to, and help me trust that Your plans are always for my good. I place my heart, my mind, and my life into Your hands, knowing Your grace will guide, sustain, and restore me. Shape me, refine me, and use me for Your glory.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Scriptures to meditate on this week (Choose 1-2):
